A Moment of Silence
In Loving Memory of
Samantha Michelle
Born to Soon
February 22, 2003
Please join us in our candle lighting tribute to our daughter tomorrow (Feb. 22). Feel free to use the candle image above to do so. Just use the Link below to insert the candle image into your blog and leave a comment here to let me know that you did so.
(Candle Link)
http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b300/leaderladyk/Siggys/smallcandleani.gif
Samantha’s Story
My wife and I were engaged and about to begin to plan for our wedding, which was to be the Saturday of Thanksgiving weekend in 2003 when we found out that we were expecting an new addition to our family. After it was confirmed that my darling fiancee was in fact pregnant, we decided to plan on getting married sooner rather than later in a very small ceremony and have a large party after the baby was born to celebrate our wedding and new arrival.
The plan was to fly to Las Vegas (guess who pushed for this locale) and just invite the immediate family and various close friends and family members. As we planned our new quickie marriage, we consulted our healthcare “professionals” (never get pregnant in Oneonta, NY as the healthcare up there is very sketchy), and were advised that flying at 19.5 weeks pregnant would be fine despite the fact that my wife had been feeling “weird” for a while.
We boarded our non-stop flight on February 21 from Kennedy Airport(JFK) in the early morning and fly almost 6 hours in never ending turbulance to McCarren International Airport(LAS) arriving there in the early afternoon. My blushing fiancee felt a little light headed and we stopped to eat at our hotel and were planning to catch a quick nap in the room before we begin the various errands we needed to accomplish before our wedding on February 22. As we were walking back to the room our world changed forever. My beloved’s water broke and Samantha Michele was about to be born at 19.5 weeks. She was rushed to the hospital, the last place to go in an emergency in Vegas. Though bleeding from her womb, the crack staff at Sunrise Hospital felt it was more important to help a man with a sprained wrist and countless others first, mind you we arrived in an ambulance. I was almost arrested as after hours and hours of my future wife laying on a gurney in the hallway in front of the admitting counter as a receptionist told me to smile, “it’s not that bad.” I completely lost it and was insisting that they get a doctor to treat my wife. “Sir please calm down we are simply waiting for a room.” Yet, I again see people getting service with runny noses and rashes whom arrived after we us.
After about 6 hours a doctor finally comes to check her out and when we ask if there was any chance that Samantha was alive and would be able to survive, he replied that it all would be fine and we would need an ultrasound to evaluate the situation. After another hour or so she had an ultrasound and the technician refused to give us the slightest hint to what she saw, other than to tell us the baby is in fact a girl. She was taken upstairs to Labor and Delivery and then after another hour or two wait and a new doctor walks in and bluntly procedes to discuss with us the procedures that she needs, such as D&C and other fancy acronyms. At this point I lose it and start screaming at the doctor and cursing and she jumps back in fear telling me to stop talking to her with that language. “F— THAT!”
It is now the early hours of February 22 and we have been at the hospital for over 16 hours and have no idea what is going on and this doctor comes in here and is completely cold and start talking over our heads. She mumbles something about “Fetal Demise” and we simultaneously scream, “SHE IS DEAD!” doctor. Her reply was simply, “you didn’t know? There was no chance of survival.” Another eruption from us, ” WE WERE TOLD THERE WAS A CHANCE, THAT SHE WOULD BE OK.” To make a long story short Samantha Michele had no chance of survival- a fact that everyone from the EMS workers to the various nurses, technicians, and doctors prior to finally advising us 12 hours later knew. We suffered through this ordeal trying to hold onto the smallest glimmers of hope only to find out that we were lied to the whole way. This poor doctor had no idea what she was walking into when she walked into our room.
The rest of the night was filled with waiting and procedures until it was finally over and around noon my closest friend was moved up to a room to begin to recover physically. It will be months and even years before she would recover mentally. What was supposed to be one of the best days of our life quickly became the worst day we could ever imagine. Thankfully, we today are married and about to celebrate our 5th anniversary together with the Tornado about to celebrate her 2nd birthday. Though, we may seem to be completely recovered from this ordeal, we will never be completely recovered. We will never forget Samantha Michele and she will forever be a member of our family.
February 21st, 2008 at 11:50 pm
[...] am not going to write about our loss because my husband wrote about it here and he captured everything that I wanted to say. Please read it and comment. We both really need [...]
February 21st, 2008 at 11:58 pm
I love you. I love that you took the time to write this. I love that you remember. I love that you gave me Samantha even if it was for such a short time. And I love that you love me so much that you wear your heart in the open for me to share in. We are stronger because of our experiences. We are better parents because we know what it is like to lose a child. And we are better friends because we were able to help each other through this. I’ve told you before but I will say it again, you have truly blessed my life.
February 23rd, 2008 at 9:00 pm
What a horrible ordeal to have dealt with. My hearts go out to you both.